My blog stats are bloody strange.

I didn't know people looked at my blog. I feel embarrassed now :3

I have quite a big audience in Russia, apparently. Well, more of an audience in Ireland but that's just people I know. I say, privet to the Russians! I can't risk using Google Translator, it'll probably translate badly and I'll just end up insulting people.

 That's what happens to me when I speak anyway...

 I've also got quite a lot of views from a mobile phone conspiracy website, now THAT is what I'm confused about. Have I mentioned mobile phones since my technology phase?

 My Mocks are in two weeks. I may or may not post my results, it depends on how well I do. I probably will post them, for teh lulz.

 Looking at your stats is a little creepy. The post on my page with the most views is the post; "You know what turns ME on?". It has 23 views as of now.

You dirty bastards.

So, these countries have visited my page;

Ireland - 139 views.

Germany - 26.

USA - 26.

UK - 16.

Russia - 11.

Latvia - 1.

Singapore - 3.

Romania - 2.

France - 1.

Ukraine - 1.

... I didn't know I even had an audience to be honest. It's like the Truman show.

I'm a little scared now.

 Ogden actually inspired me to check my stats. Now, you have scarred me, Ogden! SCARRED, I TELL YOU. SCARRED.

Oh noes, bloggage stoppage!

Well, as you may know, I have exams in 3rd year. I'll be studying 12 hours each week, so I mightn't get to post that often.
FML.

SCREENSHOT CONVERSATIONS OF 2011.

I get weird conversations all the time. Especially in 2011.

The person I'm conversing with is green. I'm always the grey speech bubble.

Here a few of them:

I say what what in the butt....

O FORTUNAAAAAA

There's a meme here somewhere...

FREE CHEESE FOR THE NEEDY PEOPLE.

And thus, a meme was born.

POOR HITLER.

Happy Hitler.

A WILD MISSINGNO APPEARS.

Oh, we love each other really.

SALAD FINGAAAZ.

Alisha becomes a brony.

:O

I AM NOT ONLY A WIZARD... I AM A SATANIST.

What Alisha has written in my official file.

First morning of 2012...

You know what turns ME on?

My on switch.

A blog post - about my sister.

In case no one knew, I have a little sister. She's 5 at the moment.
Her name is Charlotte, and she's one of the joys of my life.
I've decided to dedicate this post to her and her antics, because you know, she's a mini-me in training.


I do fight with her a lot (what would a 14 year old and a 5 year old fight about even...?), but I really love her :3
I mean, I was only 8, turning 9 when she was born. She changed my life and made me mature a lot faster than I would have. Before Charlotte, there was only two kids in my family - my brother Edward and I.
I'm not gonna lie to you - Edward could be a right douchebag to me when I was growing up. He still is, you'd think after 14 years he'd learn to be nice to me. Well, he's neutral to me now.
He has....

• Pushed me off a bunk bed when I was 7.
• Asked my parents to take me back to the hospital numerous times.
• Hurt my stomach many times - during lady times.
• Called me countless names.

There's more, but I can't be that arsed to write it all.
Well, I've always wanted a little sister - and now I have one. I'm like a second mother to her. She started school this year, in the same school I was tormented in for 8 years - but Charlotte's very assertive and sassy. She'll be okay :3
I hope.
In order to end this post on a happy note, here's a picture of her with my cousin, Laura:

2011 < 2012 (hopefully)

Well, my friends. As 2011 comes to an end, I want to reminisce on my old New Year's resolutions and see what went right for me and what didn't.


1. Become prettier.
Now, I was at a bad stage in my life when I made these resolutions. I guess one of the things I was worried about was being too unattractive for society (which really doesn't matter, because society sucks) or being attractive, but in a different way. I will admit I am attractive, but more so differently to what you would normally see. The media labels being an attractive woman as having big rounded eyes, usually blue, long luscious straight hair, a straight nose, full lips, a slim but rounded body and to be tall. I have some of these qualities, I'm pretty slender and I have curves and I have long-ish straight hair, but I don't have all of them, and it's unrealistic to think I should have these. This wasn't my mindset at the time, but I can see where I was coming from. I have a better self image now, so I think that this is counted as a success.


2. Get a proper boyfriend.
Wow, I was a right loner back then. Again, this succeeded in the year - 3 times actually. When you look at the society I live in, the 10-12 year olds are pressured into getting a boyfriend/girlfriend. Which is what happened to me when I was 11. I'm not happy about what happened back then. Well, who would be?
In my school, an all girls school by the way, if you haven't "met" someone by first year (when you were 12), you were considered a freak and an outsider, and were called "frigid". Now, I was a frigid person all the way through 1st year, but because I never gave into the teasing, I never bothered with it. And I'm glad I was mature enough to be able to do that.
Then there came the summer.
My friend Carly invited me to a disco in August, before 2nd year. I agreed to go, as I wanted to go to one, and experience one.
It was a horrible sight to behold.
Many people read about chavs on the Internet and think, "Well surely they're not that bad?"
Oh, but they are.
The girls, from aged 11 to about 15, were either orange everywhere or pale, but with obvious dark make up. All of them either wore a tight mini skirt/shorts and a clingy vest, which wasn't appealing for people with bulging bellies, or badly fitted skin-tight dresses. Most with sky-scraper heels.
Keep in mind these are ELEVEN YEAR OLDS.
I was 13 at the time, and I wore shorts and a generic t shirt. You can imagine how shocked I was.
Then the boys came along: most aged 10-16.
Nearly ALL of them had their hair spiked up in a revolting manner, they stunk of Lynx and sweat. They wore neon t shirts and baggy jeans with hi-tops.
And they all wanted to shift and/or bump and grind.
Why are these discos HELD?
I understand they're for fun, but they're just making kids more and more promiscuous...
And people wonder why we have so many sex offenders.
Well back to the disco. I was just dancing, having a good time, when this small ginger lad comes up to me. I knew him, he was one of my friends' Carly's exes, Terry. He said to me, "Will ye shift me, hun?". Me, being me, refused. Long story short, Carly and her boyfriend Ryan held me down as I was forced to digest a tongue against my will.
It was disgusting.
That was my first kiss.
Which is why, my friends will notice this, if someone's trying to get their first shift, I advise them not to do it in a disco. It's a horrible memory to have when you don't even know the person's name.
So I was in a bad state then. I just wanted someone to care for and about me.
I did find some people.
I thought perhaps Daniel would have been suitable, he was very gentlemanly towards me and bought me a drink when I was thirsty. So I asked him out. We went to the cinema, but before I knew it, he was all over me, and not in a good way. The relationship lasted another 3 days.
Then I met Liam, the scum of humanity.
I'm probably only saying bad things about him like that, because well, he's a douche.
I went out with him for a total of 75 days. In those 75 days, he...
- Broke friendships that I truly cared about
- Used propaganda against me to those friends
- Ruined my social life
- Never cared for me, only for himself.
- Intimidated me into doing things I didn't wanna do.
- Never stuck up for me if I was being bullied by chavs.
- Hated my best friend, who never did anything towards him.
- Ended the relationship in the worst way possible.
- Loved me, when he didn't mean it.
- Lusted after me, and when I wouldn't do anything, he wanted other girls.
- Looked upon me as the bad guy.
- I never did a single thing.
- And he has no morals.
- Maybe he's a douche,


Notice the anagram I made: "BURN IN HELL LIAM".
Yeah you're all thinking, "Oh my God, she's a bitch! I'm not going anywhere near her!" but I'm not normally like this towards other people. If you knew exactly what Liam had done to me, you'd be siding with me.


And now, I can haz Ogden.
I will probably explain that in another post, this is getting too long.
So has this been successful?
Well yes, as far as I'm concerned.




3. Lose weight.
That's done. Now back to binge eating.


4. Stop being "The Victim".
Judging from the things you've read about me, you'd be thinking, "Gurrrrl, why don't you stand up for yourself?"
I do, I really do try. I've had bad experiences with standing up for myself.
My parents tell me to do it. When I do it to them, say if I'm being called a "fucking cow who has no right to exist" -by my charming mother-, I would usually cower in a corner and wail to myself. I have no choice but to do that with my parents. I can't stand up to them, I get punished for it.
They refuse to recognise me as an intelligent being, they seem to think they're on the good end of a dictatorship. I get their point about them being in charge of me, but that's no reason to call me names.
It's been kind of successful I guess.


So until tomorrow, followers :)